I know, it’s been a looong time since I’ve blogged.  Sorry, a huge work project has made it barely possible to date, let alone blog about it.  I did say barely, which means I am sitting on a LOT of crazy stories, most of which happen to fall in the “scary-small world” category.  What happened last night was so horrifying, it pushed me right over the edge and back to the therapeutic haven of Datective Chronicles.

My friend Tricia decided to have a “thank-god-it-stopped-raining” party and to introduce us to her new boyfriend Derek.  The first “small world” shock of the night occurred when I ran into a colleague whose husband happens to be Derek’s brother!  The two pairs run in such different circles, they were almost the last people I’d expect to see at Tricia’s.  Key word being “almost”.  You may guess where this is going…

As my colleague and I were laughing about the strange coincidence and sharing other humorous “small town” stories, I noticed a man near the food table looking at me.  He seemed familiar, but I couldn’t quite place him and figured I must have met him at Tricia’s previous party.  When I went to refill my glass, he came right over and greeted me by name.  I searched the recesses of my mind for his name (or even how I’d know him) and was coming up totally blank.

“I am George,” he said helpfully, “we met at Mirabelle’s wedding a few years ago and are friends on Facebook.”   Just as it was about to click who he was, he added “and you emailed me on Match.”  This is where I became nauseous and started praying for the boards of Tricia’s beautiful bamboo floors to open up and swallow me alive.  But there was nowhere to go.

“Match?” I said weakly, desperately trying to remember contacting him during my seven-day trial last month (yes, I was planning to review Match here…  eventually.)  George nodded neutrally, like it was NO big deal that I hit on someone I should have recognized on the internet ; that apparently he never wrote back despite knowing me; and oh, that he though it appropriate to bring this up casually at a party!!!  As if stopping at Mirabelle’s wedding and Facebook wasn’t going to tip me off sufficiently?  “Umm, is it awkward that I brought up Match?” he asked with some surprise, for the first time noticing my extreme discomfort.

“No, not at all George.  It was quite gracious of you to tell me that I contacted you online although you didn’t email back.  Not awkward in the least.  I am sure my on-call therapist will agree.”  I was only half-joking as by this point, it was either sarcasm or tears.  We chatted a bit more, but honestly, how can you salvage a conversation that began with “hi, I am the one who rejected you online”.  I had to get away asap and share this debacle with my friends and you (if not with my non-existing-at-least-till-now therapist).

Call me overly sensitive, but I was truly struck by the level of embarrassment I haven’t experienced since…  well, I’ll save that story for another time.  I tried to figure out on my way home what bothered me most about the whole situation.  The not remembering someone I should have and exposing myself (no pun intended) online?  The sting of a rejection (how dare he - anyone - not be interested!  And what’s wrong with him, aside from complete lack of social graces or graciousness)?  The fear of him violating my privacy - you know what a freak I am for anonymity in my private life - and telling on me to the mutual acquaintances?

It’s probably all of the above and many additional button-hitting emotions that “thanks, but no thanks” brings up for so many of us.  Somehow it’s easier to take rejection when the perpetrator doesn’t rub it - albeit, cluelessly - in your face.  Then again, the universe has a pretty amazing sense of humor.  This could be pay-back time… stay tuned for another scary-small world story from the “silent” period

So, any advice on how to get over this (aside from moving to another continent?!)  What’s your best or worst small-world story in dating or otherwise?  PLEASE share!